Juulism: Difference between revisions
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Revision as of 17:25, 2 March 2020
Juulism
Juulism is a religious minority present only in the South Eastern United States.
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History
Juulism was first practiced in Oxford, MS on 3/1/2020 with the first church of Juul being erected. One day later, the First Church of Juul was griefed.
Sects
Minty Purists
Minty Purists believe that the original mint Juul pod flavor is the one truth that pervades throughout all - present everywhere and enabling our G protein-coupled receptors to produce dopamine for all of us.
Mangonites
Mangonites firmly oppose the Minty Purists absolutism and view the discounting of other flavors as sacrilege. Although preferring mango from personal preference, they see all flavors as equal - aside from fruit medley because that shit is nasty
Customs and practices
-Two ten second rips when you find gold ore followed by waving the Juul to enter party mode.
-Kissing your Juul goodnight
Positions
Juulists view the United States' move in raising the age to purchase tobacco products to 21 as an effort to suppress their freedom of religion. Juulists however deny anyone entry under the age of 18.